Book Review: For the Love of Men

This has probably been one of the hardest books to review, and thus has taken be literally months.

For the Love of Men was one of my favorite, and fastest read summer books. I finished it in two days - even with rereading and annotating. I still pull it off the shelf some days when things happen at work, on the news, in my relationships, and I consult some of the pages and lines from Plank's research.

When I first saw this book announced I was like "toxic masculinity written by a women, seems like a book about postpartum depression written by a man" - it just felt out of place. I've taken a lot of steps to see through other the other lens, points of view, and how the world affects others that are unlike me - and I usually find those resources from people at the center of that lens.

I honestly picked up the book out of a view of damage control. What the world doesn't need in the fight for equal rights is one side bashing the other, and that's regardless of the equality topic at hand. So, I wanted to know what fire this book was lighting and I ran to my local bookstore (literally) to grab it once it arrived.

(Another side note, order from your indie bookstores! Amazon is quick, but bookstores are a livelihood.)

I sat down with my notebook, highlighter, sticky notes, and the summer sunshine at my picnic table and prepared to see what this was all about. And I was so pleasantly surprised.

Why was Plank writing this, and not a man who was the topic of conversation? Well, it was explained why, along with so much more. Even now as I committed to this book review, it's hard to put into words all I learned.

I found a new appreciation for how I see the world vs my male counterparts. I found a new patience and vocabulary when dealing with topics of equality, masculinity, romance, and gender roles that I wasn't aware of before. I saw so many arguments and disagreements, past and present, with men in my life through updated eyes. I saw the workplace in a renewed way.

This isn't to say this made my lower my voice, slow the fight, or rethink the personal pushes I make for progress among women - check my social media if you're worried I suddenly backed down. But instead I saw how some of the phrases and "hot buttons" could be gone about with more awareness.

I'll share some quotes below, and highly (HIGHLY) recommend this book to anyone who has encountered toxic masculinity or side effects of it in either a personal or professional way.

"We are not a slave to our hormones - numerous factors go into our choices; one of them is wanting to fulfill expectations."

"The most important thing about mindful masculinity is that it's not about shunning masculinity, it's about claiming it back."

"Women's femininity Can't be taken away so swiftly and they are largely given permission to transgress those expectations."

This book covers topics of gender roles and expectations, suppression of emotions, workplace unbalance, home life unbalance, queer relationships, #MeToo ideas and 'rules', vulnerability - and all come with small stories from men on each topic.

If you want to buy this book online, while supporting local bookstores, Click Here! To purchase books I've reviewed and recommended, Click Here!